Im tryin to come up with good thesis, this is my current thesis If you believe that the technological dystopia portrayed in Ray Bradbury’s allegorical dystopian novel, "Fahrenheit 451," and Ridley Scott’s visually captivating dystopian film, "Blade Runner: The Final Cut," addresses issues of technocratic authoritarianism, loss of moral and emotional contemplation, and suppression of intellectual curiosity. this is a thesis but not good as the position and the reason does not connect well so i have got the feedback to connet with technological control is a method by which authoritarian governments dehumanize individuals

Question

Im tryin to come up with good thesis, this is my current thesis If you believe that the technological dystopia portrayed in Ray Bradbury’s allegorical dystopian novel, "Fahrenheit 451," and Ridley Scott’s visually captivating dystopian film, "Blade Runner: The Final Cut," addresses issues of technocratic authoritarianism, loss of moral and emotional contemplation, and suppression of intellectual curiosity. this is a thesis but not good as the position and the reason does not connect well so i have got the feedback to connet with technological control is a method by which authoritarian governments dehumanize individuals

But im not sure how i would change help me

Answer 1

To make your thesis more clear and cohesive, you could revise it to something like this:

"The technological control depicted in Ray Bradbury's 'Fahrenheit 451' and Ridley Scott's 'Blade Runner: The Final Cut' serves as a method by which authoritarian governments dehumanize individuals, leading to the loss of moral and emotional contemplation, as well as the suppression of intellectual curiosity."

This revised thesis connects the issue of technological control with the dehumanization of individuals, providing a clearer and more focused argument for your essay.