The conclusion to Doug's essay on the importance of arts education in schools reads, "While not every student will grow up to become an artist, 1.4% of working Americans are artists." Which rewrite would improve his conclusion?(1 point)
Responses
Artists are very important, and we should encourage more of them.
Artists are very important, and we should encourage more of them.
No improvement is needed.
No improvement is needed.
We teach health even though only 0.7% of working Americans are doctors, yet 1.4% of working Americans are artists.
We teach health even though only 0.7% of working Americans are doctors, yet 1.4% of working Americans are artists.
While not every student will grow up to become an artist, making and appreciating art can enrich every life.
While not every student will grow up to become an artist, making and appreciating art can enrich every life.
The rewrite that would improve Doug's conclusion is: "While not every student will grow up to become an artist, making and appreciating art can enrich every life."
To arrive at this conclusion, we should consider the original statement made and aim to provide a more compelling and impactful conclusion. The original statement highlights the fact that 1.4% of working Americans are artists, but it fails to connect this statistic to the importance of arts education.
The first option does not offer any new information or a connection to the importance of arts education. It merely restates that artists are important and we should encourage more of them.
The second option suggests that no improvement is needed, but it overlooks the opportunity to provide a stronger conclusion.
The third option makes a comparison to the teaching of health even though only 0.7% of working Americans are doctors. While this comparison is relevant, it does not directly address the importance of arts education.
The final option provides an improved conclusion by emphasizing the value of making and appreciating art in enriching every individual's life. It broadens the perspective beyond just becoming an artist and highlights the overall positive impact of arts education on individuals.