Please proofread your first two sentences.
Omit: eventually
Your attributions of father and son are fine.
Hoyer died on at the Warner Barry Pavilion, a long-term care facility. He never recovered from the stroke he suffered just once week before winning the Democratic primary on March 21, 2006. He never made another public appearance. After he retired, Democratic Party leaders eventually picked his son, Tom Hoyer, to replace him on the ballot.
“He dedicated his life to his family and gave generously of himself as an elected official,” said Tom, Hoyer’s son and elected successor. “His love for this county knew no bounds, and he will be deeply missed.”
Omit: eventually
Your attributions of father and son are fine.
Hoyer died at the Warner Barry Pavilion, a long-term care facility. John Hoyer never recovered from the stroke he suffered just one week before winning the Democratic primary on March 21, 2006. He never made another public appearance. After he retired, Democratic Party leaders eventually picked Tom Hoyer, his son, to replace him on the ballot.
If you have any specific sentences or content that you believe might need clarification, please provide that information, and I will be happy to help you further. Regarding mistakes, I see a few suggestions for improvement:
1. Change "just once week" to "just one week".
2. In the second paragraph, change "Democratic Party" to "the Democratic Party".
3. Consider adding a comma after "deeply missed" to signify the end of the quotation.
I hope this helps! Let me know if there's anything else I can assist you with.