Is it legal to staple a live rat to my wall / have a pet badger?

The rat would not agree. Do you have adequate facilities raise the badger?

across two generations my family owns about 500 acers of land sad I think so.

So I think so*

Also do you know of any legal loop holes that would allow me to do that? scientist get to literally drown dogs for "ThE saKe OF ScIeNTs".

I am not a lawyer, but I can provide some general information about the legality of stapling a live rat to a wall and having a pet badger.

1. Stapling a live rat to a wall: It is important to prioritize the well-being and ethical treatment of animals. Inflicting harm or cruelty to animals is generally considered illegal in many jurisdictions. Animal welfare laws may vary across countries and states, so it is crucial to consult the specific laws of your jurisdiction or seek legal advice to determine the legality of such actions.

2. Having a pet badger: Keeping a wild animal like a badger as a pet may be subject to legal restrictions. Wild animals are often protected by wildlife conservation laws, and it may be illegal to possess or domesticate them without proper permits or licenses. These regulations exist to ensure animal welfare and protect both the animals and the public.

To obtain accurate and up-to-date information on the legality of such actions, it is highly recommended to consult local laws, regulations, or seek guidance from legal professionals in your specific jurisdiction.